1. Grooming on public transit
This includes nail clipping, flossing, etc. How gross is this? It gets me every time. Take five more minutes in the bathroom people, do not make our commute your bathroom .
2. Not completing “The Cycle”
“The Cycle” is a term I’ve helpfully coined to remind others that when they, for example, take the ketchup bottle out of the fridge, they should PUT IT BACK IN THERE when they are done with it. Once the item in question is back in its home, “The Cycle” is complete. If you start a cycle, you are responsible for completing it. Do NOT leave me hanging.
3. Leaving traces
My motto for myself and others is generally, “Leave no trace.” That means, don’t throw trash on the ground, stinky socks on the floor, dirty dishes in the living room, hair in the drain, etc. I understand that we all have to…Function. But I don’t want to be dealing with your functioning. Or its vicious aftermath. Be aware. Leave no trace. It’s really much nicer this way, I promise.
4. Puke Surprise
The cat vomits in the night and you pretend that you’re sleeping and you know if I can’t stand knowing that a puddle of vomit is just hanging out so I will have to get up and deal with it and now that I think about it, I’m the one with the problem…well, maybe I should be the one to get up and clean it if it can’t wait until morning when, inevitably, I will awaken first and step in it, okay, never mind…
5. Disrespect in the Quiet Zone
This one’s gets me all the time. Quiet. Zone. In other words, close the mouth and stop with the speaking, for God’s sake people. Respect the Quiet Zone. It is sacred. It is beautiful. It is….Silent. And if you want to blab away on your phone or have a loud conversation, there is the rest of the train. Go sit there. No really, GO AWAY.
Exiting the train while watching a video on your smart phone, texting or otherwise not looking where you are going or paying attention to what you are doing. In other words.. WAKE UP!!! YOU ARE INTERACTING WITH THE WORLD OUT HERE!
7. And last but not least… Crap headphones.
I’m looking at you ipod with your wretched white ear buds, or any other crap headphones that project a nightmarish tinny mockery of whatever wretched thing you call music and are currently sharing with everyone around you. I actually hate you. Moderately priced good quality headphones are not rare. Do not invade my personal auditory space.
Also, get off my lawn.